


long time coming

by helsinkibaby



Category: The Flying Doctors
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Het Relationship, Community: 1-million-words, F/M, Fix It Fic, Het, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-31
Updated: 2017-10-31
Packaged: 2019-01-27 13:35:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12583036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/helsinkibaby/pseuds/helsinkibaby
Summary: Johnno and Rowie have a long overdue chat about the state of their relationship. (Or how "Unfinished Business" would have gone if I'd been writing it!)





	long time coming

**Author's Note:**

> For October bingo prompts - you had to be there, farewell to the old me

"You spend any more time in this room with me, lass, and Elsie's gonna get the wrong idea." 

Rowie looked up from Burt's medical chart, her jaw dropping at the older man's words, dropping even more when she saw the twinkle in his eyes. Considering that Burt and Elsie had been fairly well terrorising the hospital staff, her included, for the last few weeks, seeing his sense of humour was still a relatively shocking experience. Still, Rowie supposed that that was what happened when you gate crashed a trip to the beach and helped him fulfil one of his lifetime ambitions - he treated you much better afterwards. 

"Don't look so shocked," he admonished, that same twinkle still in his eyes, spreading to his lips. "I'm hardly in a position to be up to no good here..." A glance down at his chart certainly proved that. "But if I were thirty years younger..." 

"You'd still choose Elsie over me." 

It was the right thing to say, the political thing to say. But if the way Burt's smile softened, the way his eyes moved over Rowie's shoulder, looking at something that only he could see, it happened to be true. "You got that right, lass," he said. "You got that right." She'd heard him use that tone before, sitting beside him in his car, halfway to the beach, when he'd looked out at Elsie on the side of the road and said, "We weren't always like this." Now, he said, "She was something back then... all passion and attitude, fire and brimstone... a lot like you, I reckon, now that I come to think of it." Which would probably be taken as an insult by anyone else in Cooper's Crossing, but Rowie couldn't take it like that, not when she saw the look on his face, in his eyes, when he said it. "She was beautiful... and when I looked at her, I felt like I could take on the world." His eyes met hers then, dark and serious. "I know what people think when they look at us. That we make each other miserable... but let me tell you something, lass... I wouldn't trade a minute of the last forty years, not for all the waves in Surfer's Paradise. It hasn't been easy... there's been times I wanted to kill her, times I know she's wanted to do the same to me... But I'll tell you what... It's been worth it." Rowie found herself smiling, even as a lump rose up in her throat and Burt shifted uncomfortably in the bed. "Don't tell Elsie I said that, though... She'll never let me hear the end of it." 

It was such a Burt thing to say that it made Rowie laugh. "Your secret's safe with me," she said. "Doctor-patient confidentiality and all that." One last notation and she hung the chart on the edge of the bed. "I'll see you in the morning." 

Burt snorted. "You use up your days off to babysit me, you're here last thing at night, first thing in the morning... don't you have something better to do with your time? A young man of your own to see to?" 

Rowie glanced at her watch, because as a matter of fact, she did have somewhere she needed to be. And a few hours ago, she'd been so sure of what she needed to say, even if she wasn't at all sure how she was actually going to get the words out. 

Now? After hearing Burt's little speech? 

She was all torn up again. 

"Good night, Burt," was all she said as she left the room, heading to the nurses' station where she signed the last of the paperwork she needed to sign, hung up her white doctor's coat and headed for her car. 

She didn't drive to the Majestic though. Instead, she kept on going past the edge of town, out to what used to be the Blake homestead, now Johnno's place. For a while, it was going to be her home too and she'd spent many a night, many a weekend here, making wedding plans, helping him fix up the place. Since she'd called off the wedding, every time she'd thought about those days, there had been a knot of anxiety at the bottom of her stomach. Today, however, she remembered the laughter as they'd traded jokes and banter as they'd painted the kitchen, squabbling good naturedly over which bathroom suite they should choose, what it had felt like to sit on the front porch, Johnno's chest at her back and his chin on her head as she closed her eyes and let the rest of the world fade away for a little while. 

Tears came into her eyes and she brushed them away impatiently. She hated crying and she didn't want to have this conversation with blotchy eyes and a shaky voice. 

When she pulled up at the front of the property, Johnno's truck wasn't there and her heart sank a little. She hadn't factored on having to wait, had wanted to get this over and done with as soon as possible. The impulse was there to just run, to turn the car around and leave it for another day but she fought it with everything she had. This conversation was long overdue as it was. Getting out of the truck, she smiled as Stevie Ray came running towards her, tail wagging, tongue lolling out in greeting. She bent down and scratched him between his ears, laughing as he licked her face - at least someone missed her, she thought - and when he calmed down, she stood, walked towards the porch. 

He'd painted, she noted at once. Fixed the front door too and she could only guess what might have changed inside. She knew where the spare key was, even had one of her own still on her keychain, but she didn't use them, thought that might be a bridge too far. Instead, she sat down on the steps, took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, closing her eyes and concentrating on the sounds around her. 

She'd done the same thing on the beach a few days ago, listened to the pounding of the surf, felt the sea breeze in her hair and she'd smiled. Today, a different sort of breeze moved her hair, carrying not the smell of the sea but the sound of the animals in the paddock beyond the house. She heard the rustle of leaves from the trees around the property, Stevie Ray's tail thumping rhythmically on the other side of the porch and eventually she heard the familiar sound of Johnno's truck as it pulled up beside her car. 

She opened her eyes and watched him get out of the truck, walk slowly towards the gate and open it. It didn't squeak in the slightest - another change - but there was a marked difference in how Johnno approached her. Usually, he bounded everywhere, an ever present spring in his step to go with the ever present smile on his face. Now though, he moved slowly and there was a wary look on his face, like he wasn't looking forward to this conversation any more than she was. 

Then, when he got close to her, he gave her a small smile and the sun came out from a cloud behind him and the effect made Rowie's breath catch in her throat. 

Suddenly, she wasn't sitting on Johnno's front porch steps anymore. She was back on the beach, sitting beside Elsie as the two of them watched Burt taking his surfboard out beyond the breakers. "You should have seen him," Elsie was saying, her voice more tender than Rowie had ever heard it. "Back when we first met... stand and look at him, you would. And I did... believe me." She chuckled. "I know you can't picture it, not looking at us now... Maybe you just had to be there. But we had it all planned out... then he came back home to meet my parents, ask for my hand, the way you did then... and Dad got sick and died, left us the farm... we never did get to follow our dreams." She didn't sound sad though, or even resigned, just matter of fact. "But we made new ones. And I know we bicker and I know people think we hate each other... but I can't imagine my life without him in it, girlie, and that's all there is to it." 

Listening to her, Rowie understood, suddenly, part of what had made Elsie so cantankerous in the hospital - fear, pure and simple. Rowie had a lot of experience with that particular emotion, she was surprised she hadn't recognised it sooner. 

"You get yourself a man makes you feel like that, girlie, and you don't let him go," Elsie concluded, her eyes still fixed on Burt's form, now almost to the breakwater. "No matter what." 

"G'day." Johnno's voice, hesitant to match his expression, brought her back to reality. "You waiting long?" 

"No." She glanced down to the opposite end of the porch. "Besides, Stevie Ray kept me company." 

She was teasing him and he blinked, surprised at first. Then he shook his head, a rueful smile crossing his lips. "Mutt always did like you better," he muttered. Their eyes met and Rowie's stomach twisted when he dropped his gaze first. She patted the step beside her, inviting him to sit down and when he dropped down beside her, the scent of his aftershave brought back a dozen different memories, maybe more. 

"This has been a long time coming," she heard herself say. 

From the corner of her eye, she saw Johnno nod. "I just want to know what happened," he said. "I mean, one minute we're on our way to get married, the next you're hardly talking to me." 

"It was so quick, the marriage thing," she began but she stopped when she heard how she sounded, defensive and sharp. 

Johnno shrugged. "You said yes," he pointed out and she closed her eyes, remembering that moment, the joy she'd felt as he'd swung her off her feet and everyone around them cheered. 

"I did," she acknowledged. "And I meant it. I wanted a future... I wanted a future with you." 

Johnno looked more confused than ever. "So what happened?" 

Rowie joined her hands, clenched them together tightly. "I happened, Johnno," she said. "We were making wedding plans, doing up this place... I started to think that I could be happy here. With you." Johnno still didn't look like she was making much sense to him but for once, bless him, he didn't interrupt. He just waited while she gathered her thoughts and let her continue. "Johnno, until you came along, everyone I cared about, everyone I loved... I either lost them, or they let me down. My parents, my brothers... Annie..." She had to swallow hard at that one, the recently resurfaced memories of her lost childhood friend still not ones she could discuss easily. "I left Cooper's Crossing when I was eighteen, and I swore I'd never come back. The only reason I did was to rub their noses in it, show them what I'd become. I never meant to stay... never meant to make friends, fall in love. And then suddenly I had everything I didn't even know I'd wanted... for the first time in a long time I had something to lose. And that... that terrified me. So I did what I've done my whole life. I ran." 

That was what she'd realised, somewhere between talking to Burt and Elsie and sitting here on his front porch. 

She'd realised something else too. 

She didn't want to be that person any more, didn't want to run any more. She wanted exactly what she'd had and she was so afraid that she'd left it too late that she could feel her throat aching with tears, feel her heart pounding in her chest and she had to look down at her joined hands to try to get her bearings. That was when Johnno leaned into her, knocked her shoulder with his. "You didn't run far, but." 

His tone was lighter than it had any right to be, given the conversation, but it broke some of the tension, made Rowie giggle. "Only to the beach with Burt and Elsie," she allowed and he narrowed his eyes. 

"What was that like?" 

"Interesting," was the first word that sprang to mind. "They're so different... and they spent their whole married life compromising to make each other happy." 

"And all they did was make each other miserable." Johnno's lips twisted and he looked away so he didn't see Rowie shaking her head. 

"That's the thing... I'm not so sure they did." Johnno looked at her as if she'd lost her mind. "Oh, I know how they go on at one another... but I spent three days in a car with them, listening to them, looking at them. They love each other... truly and completely. And maybe they're not like Vic and Nancy, or Geoff and Kate... but they made a life together. He gave up his dreams to run her family farm. And even though she knew it could have killed him, she got in the car with him so he could fulfil a wish he'd had for forty years. They understand each other, even if they don't always agree with each other... they're there for each other, in their own way." 

Johnno shook his head, rubbed his chin with one hand. "I guess you had to be there." 

"I never had that," Rowie told him quietly and he froze, hand stopping suddenly over his lips. "I thought I never would. And I realised over the last couple of days, I did. You've always been there for me... you went into the bush to try to find Annie because I asked you to..." 

"Even though I'd already let you down, told you you were on your own," he reminded her but she wasn't going to let him get away with that. 

"I showed up here, after dumping you on the way to our wedding, barely speaking to you for weeks, asked you for a favour and then shot through." Her summary didn't show her in the best light, but it was the truth, no matter what reasons were behind it, no matter how mixed up she'd been. "I treated you badly, Johnno, I know that... and yet, here you are." 

"Yeah." Johnno shrugged, raised both eyebrows as he did so. "I'm a bit thick like that." 

"I don't think you're thick. I think you're amazing." She couldn't have stopped the words if she tried, not that she wanted to try. She needed to get this out, needed to tell him how she felt. "But we are different, Johnno... we are so, so different. I'm cautious, careful, you're like a bull at a gate. You're an open book, I can't talk about my feelings..." 

Johnno's hand, warm and strong, closed over hers. "And even when you tried, I didn't always listen." She frowned and he squeezed her hand. "Like with your dad... making you go to see him? I was so sure I was doing the right thing... all I did was hurt you." 

For once, the memory of her dad, unsteady on his feet and reeking of booze, didn't hurt. "You never got closure with your dad-" she began but he stopped her by holding up one hand. 

"That's me, Ro," he said softly. "Not you. And I should have respected that." He paused, sucked in a deep breath. "Just like I should have respected that you needed more time. I know we planned things quickly... and I know I was the one pushing for that. I think I was afraid that if I gave you too much time to think about things, you'd realise that you were making a huge mistake, settling for a bloke like me." She knew her jaw was on the floor, knew she was staring at him. His cheeks darkened and one shoulder rose and fell in a shrug. "Didn't do me much good in the end, did it?" His fingers tightened on hers. "There's plenty of blame to go around is what I'm saying." 

His eyes were dark as they looked into hers and Rowie let out a long, slow breath as she leaned into him, let her head fall against his shoulder. Her eyes fluttered shut and she felt him turn his head, felt his lips move over her hair. 

For some reason, she wanted to cry. 

But she didn't. 

Nor did she lift her head as she murmured, "I don't want to blame anyone for anything. I'm so sick of going around and around trying to figure out who went wrong and why and where..."

Johnno's fingers were moving through her hair. "Yeah... reckon I'm sick of it myself." 

Rowie closed her eyes for a moment, breathing in and out deeply. "So where does that leave us?" 

Johnno's chest rose and fell with a deep breath and then he shifted, moving around so that she had to sit up, sit facing him, their knees touching. "Right," he said, taking both her hands in his. "First thing. I still love you. I never stopped."

His words were a statement, his face was a question. One that Rowie could answer honestly for the first time in weeks. "I love you too," she told him. "I'm just so afraid that that's not enough." But there was a deeper fear there, one she'd just realised. "And I'm even more afraid that I'm going to wake up in a month... a year... twenty years... and look around and you're not there and I'll have missed out on something amazing." 

Johnno nodded and it was a measure of how seriously he was taking this that he didn't look cocky at her words, didn't make any kind of joke. "So we've agreed. We love each other. And we want some sort of future together." 

This time, there was no question in his face and Rowie found herself nodding. "But we're so different," she said again. "Are we too different?" 

"No." There was not one iota of doubt in the word. "Ok, it's not going to be easy. Maybe we're gonna have to work harder at this than Vic and Nancy, or Geoff and Kate. But I've never been afraid of hard work. Have you?" 

She didn't need to answer that question. "Can we take things slowly this time?" she asked. "No plans, no pressure... just us. Can we do that?" 

"We can do that." Johnno let go of one of her hands, lifted his to her cheek and, with the back of his knuckles, wiped at her cheek. It startled Rowie a little, because she hadn't even realised she was crying. "But it has to be different this time... from both of us." He squeezed their still joined hands. "I, Johnno Johnson, promise to always listen to you... even if you're saying something I don't want to hear. Especially then." 

Rowie could feel a laugh bubbling in her chest, a smile tugging at her lips. "I, Rowie Lang, promise to talk to you about my feelings... even if it's hard." She paused. "Especially when it's hard." 

"You have to know..." Johnno's face was more serious than she'd ever seen it, more assured too. "There is nothing you could say, or do, that's going to change how I feel about you. You know, that, right?" 

Just like that, tears were back. "I know," she whispered, bringing her own hand to his cheek, bringing her forehead to rest against his. Pressing her lips together, she closed her eyes until she heard Johnno speak. 

"So, I know we said we'd take it slow... but does that mean I can't kiss you?" She opened her eyes then, moved her head back just enough that she could see his face. The naked hunger she saw there was enough to make her breath catch in her throat. "Because I would really like to kiss you right now." 

Rowie couldn't answer him, not in words anyway. 

Luckily enough for them both, her answer didn't need any.


End file.
